Personal leadership: 7 lessons

My Elfstedentocht swim went completely differently from what we had planned. We had prepared for months. My team knew exactly when I would eat, how many kilometres an hour I wanted to swim and how we would adjust along the way. On paper everything added up.

After a few hours we had to let go of most of that plan. The water was different. My body reacted differently. Conditions changed faster than expected.

At that point you can cling to the old plan. Or you accept that reality has changed and make new choices. Looking back, that is the clearest example of personal leadership I know. Not because I had the situation under control. But because I stayed responsible for the choices I made.

The same thing happens at work. Projects overrun, clients change course, colleagues drop out. That is exactly when personal leadership becomes visible. Not in a job description, but in behaviour.

What personal leadership is

Personal leadership means taking responsibility for your own behaviour, choices and development. Even when things go against you. You focus on what you can influence yourself, not on what is outside your control.

Everyone shows initiative when everything is going well. The real test comes when a plan fails or a deadline is under pressure. That is why in my talks I rarely discuss leadership as theory. Concrete situations stick better. Here are seven you will recognise in any workplace.

Seven situations

1. Taking responsibility when something goes wrong

After a hard training session or race it is easy to look for the cause outside yourself. Bad conditions. A stronger opponent. That does not make you any better.

I look at my own part first. Not because everything is my fault, but because that is where I have the most influence. Teams grow faster when people look at their own contribution instead of pointing at someone else.

2. Adjusting when the plan no longer works

No plan survives reality without changes. During the Elfstedentocht swim we kept making new choices. Not because the preparation was poor, but because the circumstances changed.

Markets change and priorities shift. Personal leadership then is not stubbornly holding on, but adjusting without losing sight of the goal.

3. Asking for help

Many people think personal leadership means solving everything yourself. My experience is the opposite.

Without my support team, volunteers and supporters I would never have completed the Elfstedentocht swim. They saw what I could no longer see myself. They kept me sharp and gave me confidence when I had lost it for a while. Asking for help shows that you care more about the shared result than about your ego.

4. Taking feedback without getting defensive

As an elite athlete you get feedback all the time. Sometimes pleasant, often not. It is exactly the feedback you are not waiting for that teaches you the most.

That takes something. Listen first, then respond. Stay curious. Don't immediately explain why things are different. Colleagues who deal with feedback this way build a culture in which everyone keeps learning.

5. Taking initiative without being asked

Nobody had to drag me out of bed every morning to train. That goal was mine.

You see the same difference at work. Some people wait for instructions. Others see a problem and start on a solution. It does not have to be big. A colleague who helps a customer before being asked. An improvement someone shares before anyone requests it.

6. Staying calm as the pressure rises

Before important races I was just as nervous as anyone else. The difference is not the absence of stress, but what you do with it. Panic helps nobody. Go back to what you can influence.

During big changes people first look at everything that is uncertain. Personal leadership turns the attention to the next step you can take today.

7. Keep learning, even after success

After Olympic gold I could have thought I knew everything. That was exactly when I had to start again. My illness had already taught me something else before. The Elfstedentocht swims later taught me very different lessons again. None of those experiences made me finished. They made me more curious.

What it gives an organisation

When people take responsibility, show initiative and are open to feedback, the way they work together changes. Problems come up sooner. Colleagues help each other faster. Changes go more smoothly.

That is what I discuss with organisations in my talks. Not from a theory book, but from moments when choices under pressure made the difference.

It starts with one choice

People sometimes ask me what the most important quality of personal leadership is. I don't think there is one answer to that. I do think it starts every day with a small choice. Taking responsibility or waiting. Holding on to what is not working, or choosing a different route.

Those choices seem small at the time. Looking back, they turn out to be decisive. I learned that in the pool, during my illness and in the water in Friesland. Personal leadership does not start with a job title. It starts with how you deal with setbacks every day.